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A conversation with “divorce”


The alarming rise in the number of divorces in Kuwait and the Gulf countries is a social phenomenon that is novel to our society. In our past, all the tribes of the Arabian Peninsula had various customs and traditions in the way in which couples dealt with marriage. Since the advent of Islam, these customs have uniformed to a certain extent in the way in which marriage problems were treated. Little did families reach out to a divorce settlement as a final solution, and it was only painfully accepted out of necessity.

However, in these last few years, divorce rates have accelerated to a shocking degree. Now more than half of all marriages in Kuwait end in divorce and in the UAE, around 46 percent of marriages end in divorce.

What is forcing thousands of families to suffer and bear the pains of divorce? Why are couples crashing and burning? How can they raise children with broken homes? What went wrong in the first place? To find an answer, we have decided to have a short chat “divorce” itself, in an attempt to negotiate a deal with it, to at least halt its acceleration.

I would like to make this meeting as brief and as productive as possible. Dear “divorce”, why are you succeeding among us in these days more than you ever did in the past?

Divorce: Well, to answer this question I ought to bring to everyone’s attention the countless     reasons why I am so successful. Typically financial hardship and moral decline support my     success, regardless of educational advancement. But even in today’s world when life is more     comfortable, when economies are growing and we have insurance, divorce continues to rise.     The modern psychology and social media-dominated culture can be credited as well.

Allow me to interrupt. Kuwait and Qatar are tax free, the Emirates treats their citizens like royalty and the Saudis are financially supported as well, it seems to me that every reason for your success is countered by another reason that defuses it, so what is the key of your soaring rise in the social charts?

Divorce: I might not be able to provide an answer that will satisfy you, but I am     enormously  empowered by westernization. Younger generations have adapted western     clothes and music, education and culture, they are trained and entertained to accept     homogeny. In other words, I am globally successful due to the adaptation of the selfish and     materialistic qualities of capitalism. It is inevitable and unavoidable to break the nucleus of     families to smaller and smaller units only to meet the demands of homogeny that mankind has     chosen for itself.

I would like to inform you, “divorce”, that this answer is not satisfying, because the world  is not fully homogeneous, and it will not be. Traditions and cultural heritages of family values and good morals will prevail over this form of homogeny. Keep in mind that mankind’s first stage started homogeneously. Case in point, it’s the relentless wheels of social evolution that will always drive mankind to be heterogeneous. However, I ought to ask a final question: Is there a man-to-woman relational concept the polluted the minds and distorted behaviors of this unfortunate generation?
Yes indeed, the unachievable standards of romance, that is like the rest of the goods and     services that the “wealth-shocked” gulf has imported, is an unfamiliar idea.

In the past, married couples optimized dignity for their relationship over passion, with age old     noble truths such honor and integrity, more importantly, the essence of their marriage was     bonhomie and mercy, love was a bonus. But when chivalry announced dead in the west,     people gravitated more towards the perception that marriage is just a socially accepted form     of “boyfriend-girlfriend”   zone. “Divorce”, Thank you. Superb answer, I hope to never see you     again.

I would like to conclude, that in my personal opinion, that the west cannot be totally blamed as a civilization for the divorce crisis in the Gulf. There is an awkwardness in the adoption of unsynchronized attitudes, such as the need for a young woman to halt her social progression of marriage until she becomes fully independent from all male influences, even from fatherly influences as well is opposite to the traditional way of marriage, in which the late teen immediately got married, to rise together in a warm and friendly soil, to create parity much more early, unlike the marriages of two completely saturated characters unwilling to give and take in the infamous equation of “power games”. My point of view is that “halves” should complete each other in the same social soil and traditional climate, only then that we will not only fight “divorce”, but beat it.

By Jeri Al Jeri

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